31.5.12

Against the wall..

Dear Lara,

It's okay. It's going to be okay. It's okay to admit you can't deal with this alone. It's okay to feel tired of being the perfect daughter. It's okay to want to stop being strong and detached. It's okay to ask them to back off until you make up your mind. It's okay to admit the only reason why you want to leave is because you're desperately longing for someone to keep you from leaving. It's okay to take a break. It's okay to be tired. It's okay to mess up and to make mistakes. It's okay to choose yourself over others sometimes. It's okay. It's really okay.

It's not okay to blame others for your feelings, because you are the one that's compromising your happiness. It's not okay to give up on your dream because a part of you believes that dreams are only beautiful as long as they're unattainable. It's not okay to spend every single day trying to change what is going to remain the same. It's not okay to ask others to expect less from you when you always worked hard to make them proud of you. It's not okay to waste your time thinking that meaningless lists are going to help you. It's not okay to sabotage your own future. It's not okay to work for that ideal future you're too afraid to live in. It's not okay. It's really not okay.

Breathe. Cry. Breathe again. Think. Decide. One final time.

No comments:

Post a Comment